Shit redistribution theory

Within the context of my previous stupidity theory, in which I postulate that stupidity is both contagious and hereditary, I want to expand on a closely related topic which is shit redistribution.

At a glance they might seem like different topics, but they are closely related. Stupidity is clearly contagious. When you meet an idiot and that idiot has a partner, that partner is generally an idiot. When those two idiots team up and produce a new person (i.e. baby), it generally grows up to become an idiot, thus proving it is also hereditary. Nature and nurture.

The shit redistribution theory also includes both contagion and inheritance, within other properties. The basic hypothesis is that shit is a widely available resource of which there is no scarcity. It is maybe the only truly communist product, without having to go through the process of a socialist regime. Everyone has a share of it, there is plenty to go around and regardless of how much you amass, you can always acquire a higher amount. No sum zero.

Shit can be contagious, since someone who has an overflow of the resource might tend to distribute it freely to those around him through any kind of contact. It can also be inherited by any ascending or descending blood line relative.

The interesting thing about this abundant resource is that it can also be freely redistributed, and the sum of opposing shits or shits acquired by different people, is that they might just cancel each other out. Because shit can be a matter of perspective, because shit can be solved, people can help you out with your shit. Redistribute it, ask for help, ask for counsel, or just find someone to listen to you. You will feel a whole lot better.

If by any chance your listener does not meet the redistributed shit cancels itself out criterion, you might have found a shit multiplier. In these cases, different shits multiply themselves, by the factor of the other person’s meanness value. 

(my shit) ^ m where m = meanness factor

These people are toxic. Walk away.

There is someone out there who will help you reach the following formula:

(my shit) + (your shit) = 0

Never let that person go.